It took one mother to bring up ten kids but 10 kids to take care of one mother.

Remembering Mama

Written by, her one large family!

“God said to enlarge the world, and I did”

Our Mother, Our Grammy, Our Great Grammy.

A Beautiful Love Story

Mama meets papa – It was in this very church, right up there in that same choir loft, a most beautiful young girl was singing when she spotted a dashing, most handsome, young man below. She turned to her girlfriend standing next to her and said “who is THAT?” “Oh, her friend responded, that’s Soupy… that’s not his real name but everyone calls him that.” After mass, she kept her eye on him and as she was leaving the church, she had this most outrageous thought! “I’ll just make a snowball and toss it at him to get his attention!” Now being in an orphanage, there’s not a lot they let you do there, and making snowballs, was strictly forbidden so she was not experienced in this area at all, as she had never before made one! She thought for a moment, “I’m pretty sure I can do it though,” Then realizing SHE JUST COULDN’T SAY “NO,” she slouched to the ground, grabbed a big ward of snow, formed her first snowball and with all due respect to the senior folk that walk between them, she hurled it high and took her best shot hitting my father right in the back of his neck with the cold, icy snow falling into his shirt collar! He turned around and saw this beautiful young woman and instantly fell in love with her!

Shortly afterward, they found themselves once again in church, but this time it was my father’s turn. When services were over and my mother was putting on her coat she realized her button was missing. She began to look frantically for her missing button. Soupy (aka Carmelo Palermo) approached her and claimed to have found the missing button on the floor (although some of us think he pulled it off). He said he would not give it back until she agreed to a date. My father knew he had stumbled upon the most beautiful girl in the world and he wasn’t letting her go!

He proposed and of course she said “yes,” (since it was her idea to begin with) and they were married right here at this alter on April 12th 1942 the day before her 22^st birthday.

And that was how my mother lived her life. Whatever she wanted, she just took a chance, and then simply left the rest to God assured it would all come out right.

My mother’s true joy in life was her children. My mother lived every day for her children. It wasn’t a new car, big house or great vacation plans, but the softness of a newborn baby, the pitter-patter of tiny feet, watching a child grow and helping him or her with all their little problems… that was her true heart’s delight!

And she wasn’t a mother to just her own children but rather to anyone and everyone who knew her. She was like a love “magnet”… no one escaped her love… she just drew them in.

Papa would call her “Little Mother” and then give her a kiss!

For a meal, she would buy one piece of steak and somehow feed 10 hungry mouths plus papa and herself. It was like the biblical story of the multiplying of the fishes and the loaves! She would make pies and cupcakes, almost every day, and every morning she would wake you up for school with a back rub.

When one of her children got married, she would give them a statue of Saint Joseph to place in their kitchen, she would say that one of the nuns in the orphanage told her “as long as you have Saint Joseph in your kitchen, you will never be without a crust of bread.”

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Matthew 18:3 states:

Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. (Matthew 18:3)

No matter how many children mama had or how many years passed her by, Mama somehow always remained “that same little girl from the orphanage.” She found pleasure in the simple things in life. She loved her big porch on her old house. She would sit there on her swing “just enjoying the day.”

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Mama had difficulty with her eyesight the last few years and had become totally blind but that did not deter her lifestyle. She simply gave it to God and then continued on, going to restaurants, and the Christmas Tree Shop, as if nothing had changed!

Most people were amazed at the way she could still eat without a spill. Her ability to give complete trust over to you as you helped her walk from one place to another. At the way her humility allowed her to accept everything that came her way without question, without concern but with dignity and understanding.

And, even though she could not see, we were all amazed at just how great she could still communicate! There is a Japanese woman that lives close by and in addition to not seeing; neither knew each other’s language! But, somehow they still communicated! The Japanese woman would be there waving her head back in forth and side to side placing her hands on her heart and eyes and mama would be saying hello in her own little voice and wishing the lady a nice day!

Many people would comment that mama could see much better than those that have their eyesight.

She can now see the snowflakes and the moon and stars, something she had hoped to see again.

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She would make everyone feel important. Even Mike the mailman! Although confined to her chair, she would listen for him each day and when she heard him approaching she would let out a big “hello Mike” and go on to inquire about his mother’s health!

No matter how sick she had become, or what pain she may have been in, she would always tell you that she was feeling “a little bit better,” just so that YOU would feel better.

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Devotion to The Blessed Virgin Mary.

Her life in the orphanage was very difficult with no amenities, no comforts and nothing to call her own. When the other children would receive a visit from their parents or a friend, she would be alone. So, she would go to the top floor of the orphanage and look out over the city and ask the Blessed Virgin Mary, the mother of God, to be her mother too since she did not have one.

When we were children, mama would say her rosary every day after all her household chores where completed and she would have about ½ hour before the school bus dropped the children off. She would sit on her rocking chair and look out the window and recite her rosary.

She started a Rosary group in 1973 and through the help of her dear friend Joan, that group continues to recite the Rosary every Wednesday. When my mother prayed the Hail Mary, she prayed with such reverence. She would say; “you had to concentrate on every word and say it from your heart. You cannot let your mind wander but concentrate on the mystery you are saying and picture it happening as if it was happening right now before you.”

She has a very large book of prayer requests that have been prayed upon for all those years. Whenever someone had a physical illness, family problem, looking for a job, any challenge in life, she would write their name in the book and pray for them not only on Wednesday but every day because every day was a Rosary day! In fact many days, she would say up to three Rosary’s a day! When my mother became blind, she would say, “I can’t’ do much anymore but I can still pray!”

My mother had a great devotion to the Blessed Mother and the Blessed Mother was there for her.

Funny Story, we had an old car that would only start when it wanted to. Mama would take us down the road to the frozen, Canobie lake so we could ice skate. She knew that even if she was able to get us to the lake, there was a very good chance the car would give trouble and it may not start for the return trip home. But, she knew how important it was to her children to go skating so she took a chance anyway. After a time on the ice we would return to the car frozen and anxious to return home BUT, when she turned the key the car would not start. So, mama would pound gently on the steering wheel while repeating over and over; “come on Blessed Mother, come on Blessed Mother,” and wouldn’t you know it, but the car would finally start and we would return home! This happened several times! Mama depended on the Blessed Mother like we depend on our mechanic!

Mary is of course, my mother’s heavenly Mother but somehow that little orphan girl, crying at the window looking over the city for a mother to love her must have melted Mary’s heart and so between them, a very special bond was formed and only grew stronger through the years.

Carolyn

My sister Carolyn and my mother were a team. They were always together helping each other through the toughest times. You wouldn’t find one without the other. You could say, that Carolyn was mama’s best little helper. She supported my mother whenever and wherever needed.

Carolyn and mama had some great times together. You could often find them at their local K-mart buying the most beautiful holiday merchandise. They both felt it very important to celebrate every holiday. In fact, I think they made up a few or their own just so they could have something to celebrate! They always made sure the house was festive because they understood the importance of creating your own excitement and happiness!

Tommy

This past August, mama lost her son, my brother Tommy. He returned to the Lord before her. Tom was a good son with lots of talents and a witty sense of humor. Tom was a great carpenter among many other abilities. We believe Tom returned first, so that he could build a castle for his lovely mother and welcome her to heaven in style!

Mama’s own words about Tom from the Christmas Book.

“Tom was busy working and he used to come see me off and on. He used to make me laugh and it felt so good to see him and hear his voice! Every time he came he would bring dessert and his favorite and my favorite were éclairs. We would eat them sitting down together. If felt like a holiday!

I remember him giving me a ride on his mini-bike around the driveway. I was afraid when I first sat on it. But then, I enjoyed the ride!

The day after he died, I was sitting in my chair. I wasn’t sleeping, and I heard him calling me. I heard him say, “Mama” …. nice and clear!”

Love,

Mama

One of Tom’s favorite memories of mama was that after visiting with her, and he had said his goodbyes and headed out the door, mama would always appear in the window and continue waving goodbye until he drove away.

Thank You Mama for:

birthing us then snuggling us in your warm arms

kissing us gently upon our head as you lay us down to sleep on clean, soft sheets

changing, oh so many diapers and wiping the runny noses

rolling up our sleeves when they were too long

rolling up your sleeves when times got tough

encouraging us always to take the next step

disciplining us ever so gently

being by our beds when we were sick….holding that basin

helping us with homework and smoothing it over with papa when report cards came out

believing in us always even when we were not so certain

making our problems yours and helping us to get through

being on the other end of the phone when we needed an ear

teaching us about God, the Blessed Virgin Mary, her son Jesus and good Saint Joseph

for smiling through the pain even though it was just to make us feel better

thank you for being so pretty

being the best little mother a little boy or little girl could ever dream to have

One or Two Words to describe Mama/Grandma(from everyone)

Heavenly sent

My everything

My love

Mother Angel

Beautiful Godmother

Peacemaker

Sweetest angel

My compass

Loving arms

Loving smile

Loving and caring

Little mother

Full of life

Forgiving

Understanding

Inspiring

Wonderful

Faithful

Angelic

Tranquil

Flying Dove

Confident in God

Amazingly upbeat

Optimistic even in the midst of adversity (edited by author-JR)

Truly missed

Irreplaceable

Beautiful woman

Softest skin

Her hug said it all

Sweet as pie

Sweetest smile

So humble

Perspective

Guiding light

Matriarch

Holy

My sweet beautiful angel mother

Mama’s/Grandma’s Favorite Sayings:

Put it in God’s hands.

That’s where you’re smart!

All you can do, is try

Always have something to look forward to

Good luck instead of good bye.

It was like a holiday!

Never give up the ship!

Tomorrow is another day.

It can always be worse.

Everything happens for a reason.

Offer it up!

You made my day!

Thanks a Million!

Hot dogs and beans!

Crying never did anyone any good; you’ll just make yourself sick

Your prayers are as good as mine

We are only here for a short time

Stick together!

Who would’ve thought we’d be having a party!

Three “secrets” of mama’s, passed along to you:

Keep Christmas Always in your Heart!

You wake on Christmas morning with a song in your heart. It’s like no other day of the year. Everyone is in love with the day and with each other. Nothing can be wrong. Love abides and all is well in the universe! Welcome each day as if it were Christmas!

Be a Mother to Everyone!

Treat everyone you meet tenderly and with much patience and kindness such as that of a mother to her child. Lend a hand, console, encourage, love. You, graciously sacrifice so that the other may have. A mother delights in the happiness of her child… there is a strong love connection. You also must develop this connection with others…. LOVE EVERYONE as if they were your own child.

Put God before anything else.

This is the most important. Have deep faith in God and pray often. You must learn to give everything to God. If you give Him all of your problems, nothing can bother you and you will have happiness and lasting joy!

“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you wil find rest for your souls. For My Yoke is easy and my burden light” (Matthew 11:28-30)

Closing

On Monday, January 14th God began to call out for mama. And, as we continued to work feverishly tending to all her needs she looked around and then up and there to her eye’s delight, she saw the blessed Mother, Mary’s little boy Jesus and her own son, Tommy. And, next to them, was the man with the snowball on his neck… and, once again, SHE JUST COULDN’T SAY, “NO!”